Day 10

Its so depressing
to see all the work you've done
brushed aside
like its unimportant
worthless
meaningless
because somebody else
doesn't think its interesting:

Not even a passerby,
but the one who determines your grade
The one whose partner
told you to read
all twelve of those books
and when you show up to the meeting, proud as ever tha tyou finished them all before the halfway point in the term,
only to hear their nasty
cruel, careless, off-hand words
comment on how useless
dumb
stupid
worthless
all that reading is. and not to do it.
oops. too late.
guess my effort is just as
dumb
stupid
worthless.
That's how I feel.
I hate you all. If quitting this IQP wouldn't fuck over my graduation
I would
and leave you all in the lurch
not tat you'd care
'cause its not like
in your eyes
I matter, after all.
I'm just a mocking post
because I'm out of your loop
and entirely not worth being around.
here it is again
everything I do
comes to nothing
and everyone looks down on me
no matter how much effort
I put forth
I am
worthless
and I
hate it all.
I wish I could kill them.
though that wouldn't solve a thing
and it makes me sad
that nothign I do
will ever change
their contempt
their disgust
their fear of me
like I'm a beast
that wants only to destroy them
when really
they seek me
to hurt
and punish
without purpose.